Wednesday, January 22, 2003
Iraqee Sanctions to Headline Dave Sanction's "Peado Pop" Student Union Tour
- "the backstage rider is going to be a small thing" confirms Sanction
- full line up dependent on "ongoing police investigations" - "we're hoping that a few top name acts will be disgraced in the coming weeks and then fall in to our disgraced-price bracket. I've heard that a certain mister Elton J and a mister P Collins have been causght with their pants down, up to their knees in kids. Here's hoping!"
- "we are hoping to beak in some fresh new talent as well on this tour", said Sanction at today's launch, "but enough about backstage! Seriously though, our opening act will be Mc Sydney Cook who is attempting to make a sucess of that difficult crossover from Peado to Popstar. But his fun-rolling track "Is it Jam or is it Juice?" is a real floor filler.."
Matthew 11:40 AM
a week in Iraqee Sanctions' media
Iraqee Sanctions' Lifted!
Strong man elevates entire band over his head as they sit in a mini cooper.
Iraqee Sanctions' "responsible for the deaths of thousands of children" says John Pilger
Sanction lays blame squarely at the door of HMV security services for gross instore-signing mismanagement.
Iraqee Sanctions' Frustrate The Passage Of Vital Medical Aid
Band play improptu gig in the middle of Great Ormond Street hospital.
Matthew 11:31 AM
Sanction Considers It Opportune Time to Promote the Iraqee Sanctions
Always one to guage the promotional wind, Dave Sanction has determined that the time is right for him to launch his musical-tribute-act-to-his-non-musical-life - the Iraqee Sanctions. At the press conference he staged yestaday, Mr Sanction appeared with a bald pate and germanic-belgian accent akin to those endured by Hans Blix - in order to announce "the discovery of songs of mass(ive) excellence";
"yestaday me and my team arrived at an Abbey Road address and discovered thirteen empty CD tracks which were of sufficient size and baring to accomodate songs of the most potent and effecting nature - the "Sanction Seal" on the CD front only confirmed me in this opinion. Further examination of the recording equipment yielded the song-heads themselves - such was the purity of the distilled contents thereon I have concluded that the unleashing of just one track, when fired by a long-range CD distributor, would wipe out all the players and haters the world over".
The comic effect that was produced when this well spoken European dignitry was made to speak in street slang - "the players and haters" - was a phenomenon your correspondent can only compare to that occasion when Aliester McGowan took his Sven Goran Eriksson impersonation down the disco to "ave it in largeness, ya!". Sanction's next trick was to parody George W Bush - who seemingly condemened the band as "evil doers". Confused, Sanction had to spend some time explaining to his audience that Evil was the latest word - like bad and wicked before it - to cross over and come to mean bodacious.
Matthew 11:26 AM
Tuesday, January 21, 2003
"Art is the reduction of the external apparatus into a
form whereby it becomes the embodiment of spirit and
freedom" - Hegel on Sanction.
Matthew 10:38 PM
Wednesday, January 01, 2003
2003 - Chinese Year of the Sanc.
Matthew 9:50 PM
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